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The Jamie Jarboe Story

How do you define a hero?

A hero is often a symbol of the greater good, a person who has a character of high caliber: decency, respect, pride, honesty, justice or the pursuit of peace and equality. A hero is someone who is able to put someone else before himself or herself. Sometimes, a hero is not the one who is the victor in every battle, but is someone who walks through life having held true to those qualities which highlight the good in humanity.

However you define a hero, Heroes continue to frame how we think about ourselves: "What would we do if we were them?"

The provocative case of SSG Jamie Jarboe

On April 10th 2011, just short of Jamie’s 27th birthday and a mere two months after his wedding to his wife Melissa, SSG Jamie Jarboe was shot by a sniper while on a mission to Southern Afghanistan with Alpha Company, 4th Squadron of the 4th Cavalry Regiment.

Jamie Jarboe later told columnist Tom Sileo of unknownsoldiersblog.com that "the scariest part was when I realized what happened ... the blood was soaking my clothes. ... I remember looking at my hand and it wouldn't move." Jarboe said that, as he lay on the ground staring up at the sky, he thought about his wife and two children. “If I'm going to succumb to these wounds then it will be on my own terms ... I'm not dying out here."

The Journey

Paralyzed from the chest down, Jamie fought to stay alive.

"He made a promise to come home to the kids and me," says his wife Melissa. "His first words [home] were I love you," says Melissa, then, "Don't leave me."

She didn't.

For the next 11 months, Jamie endured more than 100 procedures and surgeries. This Hero’s medical care could be characterized, in the most charitable way, as unfortunate.

Public support for the Jarboe Family was overwhelming. Supporters from all over the world would check in daily on Facebook to see how the wounded warrior & his family were doing.

The soldiers of 4/4 came home in February, 10 months after Jarboe was shot. It was an emotional reunion.

"He was happy," recounts Melissa. "He smiled ear to ear; he missed them so much."

But two days later, according to his wife, "he started coding." Jamie’s heart stopped and started; his lungs collapsed. "They told us he was terminal, but we wanted to keep fighting," Melissa said. Jamie told his wife he was "not ready to die."

During the last few days of Jarboe's life, his nurses asked him if he regretted his service: If he had to do it all over again, would he join the military? Would he go to Iraq and Afghanistan?

Melissa said her husband didn't hesitate in his reply: "I have no regrets. I love the military. I love my country. I'd take that bullet again." Melissa said she can't complain either. "He came home to me."

Soon afterwards, according to Melissa, "everything started to shut down" due to complications from surgical procedures and infections. Jamie pronounced "We have only one choice... Get a piece of paper and a pencil."

The Choice

It was then Jamie made the choice to die as he had lived. He charged his wife to continue on with the causes he and Melissa had supported during the eleven months Jamie was in the hospital. He asked Melissa to care for his soldiers, to give them a voice, support, and, most of all – HOPE –

Upon his homecoming, Jamie said he felt as if America had forgotten that, in another country, there was a war still being fought and, even though some veterans came home to their families, they still waged war within themselves.

While Jamie appreciated the overwhelming support his fellow citizens had shown him during his time of physical struggle, he realized he had been struggling with the war in his own mind the prior six years, and no one knew he needed their support long before he was physically injured. Jamie saw how Melissa had linked the world to his need for prayer and support via the Family’s Facebook Prayer page, and he had the foresight to see this link could be created for other Military Families. "No one cared about me until I was wounded; they cared because you let them. You showed them a way and, after I die, everyone will care because I know you will show them a way."

The Birth of a Legacy

Jamie’s choice was backed with action and the initial funding for the Jamie Jarboe Foundation was provided via Jamie’s life insurance proceeds. Gold Star Wife Melissa created the Jamie Jarboe Foundation as a Military-centric nonprofit charity, with the mission to assist Military Veterans and their families with medical needs, to create awareness, and to provide local communities a support network to show Military Families they are not alone.

Since her husband’s passing, Melissa has become known as a voice and advocate of Veterans, those on Active Duty, and their collective families living all around the world. "I'm putting all the love and admiration I have for Jamie into everyone around me," she says. "It helps me heal and helps me become a better person."